disculpar answered your question: New theme.
hate! My eyes are bleeding. But I don’t go to your actual tumblr so idc lol
I’ll probably change the colors around when I find some that match well tbh.
OMG make her get on Tumblr. I love geeking out about my music.
for everything bad that happened to you in the year. the “bad” opened my eyes to who are the true people in my life. i’ve learned a lot about myself and what flaws need to be worked on. i couldn’t be happier with the “bad” that happened to me this year
Exactly. I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life. I’ve had such a roller-coaster of events this year. But I don’t regret any of it. What I’ve done, what’s happened to me… it has helped to shape me into the woman that I am now. I’ve learned lessons, I’ve learned who I can trust, I’ve been opened myself up more fully and been hurt, but I’ve also discovered someone who will catch me and I wouldn’t have met him if even one circumstance was different.
I refuse to look back and hate anything, even if it is/was depressing at the time. Overall, I’m actually proud of myself.
I understand the feeling. When I wanted to die before, I tried to do it with drugs so I could die alone and quickly so they wouldn’t have to walk in and see my body or watch me die slowly in a hospital bed. Then Jason hung himself in his father’s house. I remember seeing/hearing about how torn up his father was. I still wanted to die but I just couldn’t bear to do that to my mother.
Honestly that had such a huge impact on me and is part of why I decided to seriously try to clean up. I still think about hurting myself, but now not only do I have to think about my family, but my husband and his family. They’ve been there for me when my own family would not. But sometimes that just makes me feel even more trapped here. Like I’m in pain, but it’d be so selfish to put them through that when they have supported me so much these past few years.
Have you to talked to anyone about this? I know sometimes there just isn’t anyone IRL and talking to your family about it just doesn’t seem an option because then they’d watch your every move and question themselves. But talking to a shrink or someone you know online may be a good option. Hell, maybe a shrink could prescribe something that helps. I know some other people have gotten meds and it mad some of the feelings go away. I can’t take anything because of my other illnesses, but maybe you can? Or you can text me if you want. I’ll message you my number.